I can’t fucking believe how fucking fat I got. Now I’ve got to go on a fucking diet or get some fucking exercise or something.

Fucking tailgating.

Grey blazer, blue jeans, and black fucking loafers…

Goddamn fucking contact lenses are bugging me.

Fat people at fucking sci-fi conventions dressed up like fucking characters from a fucking TV show or a movie.  Jesus Christ.

The fucking weather is so fucking nice today.

Holy fuck how much food did I eat?!

I can’t believe how many of my fucking mayorships she’s stolen. Fucking foursquare, I hate you.

To the guy on the train: uncross your fucking legs so the seat next to you can be used. Don’t be such an asshole.

Fucking fish again.